The Public School of IGNERUNT FQLZ!

Our Selected King has Discovered that many People LOVE his "Funetik Ingglish," whereby one Sound is spelled in one Way, as opposed to 5, 10, 15, 20 or more Different Ways to spell one simple Sound. Most of this Inspired Book is written in Phonetic English, just to help Intelligent People to Learn it, Quickly. Remember this: "A Person's Intelligence is Measured by how Quickly such a Person can Learn New Things, including 'Funetik Ingglish, ' which, in this Case, is so easy as to be Comical!" - Dr. Samuel Edison. Nevertheless, in spite of being so easy to Learn, the Public School of Ignorant Fools Rejects the Idea: beCause it might Cause X-number of School Teachers to Retire, whose Students could Learn how to Read and Type any Word in the English Language within a Day or 2, if they could Pronounce it, which would be Bad for School Teachers, who might Lose their Jobs. But, not to Worry: beCause our Selected King has lots of Better Jobs for those School Teachers, with much Higher Pay! This Inspired Book tells HOW